I gotsum squash

It may not be a big deal to all you good people, but i am loving the whole process: watching the seeds i planted in june grow up to be grown up plants... and they aren't dead yet - AND in fact I am seeing some real deal veggies in my garden now!

Keep it simple

My dad in conversation would at times use that military saying: K.I.S.S. : Keep it simple stupid. I was thinking of that this morning, when i was reading my D. Bonhoeffer devotional:

It is not Christ who has to justify himself before the world by acknowledging the values of justice, truth, and freedom. Instead, it is these values that find themselves in need of justification, and their justification is Jesus Christ alone. It is not a "Christian culture" that still has to make the name of Jesus Christ acceptable to the world; instead, the crucified Christ has become the refuge, justification, protection, and claim for these highter values and their defenders who have been made to suffer. It is with Christ, persecuted and suffering together with his church-community, that justice, truth, humanity, and freedom seek refuge. It is the Christ who is unable to find shelter in the world, who is the sheter to whom one flees for protection; only thus is the full breadth of Christ's power revealed.

I am not in the habit of listening to classical music, but the last two days, I have been listening to Handel's Messiah. Get this: Handel wrote it in 24 days!! Can you imagine?

I have two favorite sections: One, the chorus section named, "Lift up your heads", where the chorus is singing the Psalm, "Lift up you gates, so the King of Glory can come in. Who is the King of Glory? He is the Lord of Hosts!!!"

The second is a movement entitled "For unto us a child is born", singing the scripture of Isaiah: "Unto us a child is born, unto us a Son is given. And the Government shall be upon His shoulders. And His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Almighty God, the Everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace."

You may wonder why I am linking Bonhoeffer and Handel together this morning. I think in these two artistic expressions, I loved the simplicity of resting all focus on Jesus Himself. In our world, where self help books, the likes of "Your best life now", busy schedules, the worries of the world, our search for Him through intellectualism, trying to understand the innerworking of ourselves and everything else.... All of the mess that we fill our lives with.... That perhaps for a moment I would not focus on how He has blessed us, or how He has not blessed us...

But simply that He is. And He is worthy.

Bread inspires me

Ode to Bread

Sourdough, Buttermilk, and more
You are the food group of which I exalt and adore
If only your carb grams equated to three grams or four

I would not be eating cow meat in your stead...

Adkins instructs sadly that I cannot eat you
He says the hardest is the first week or two
But I’m thinking one more day and I’m through

I need another serving of red meat like I need a hole in my head…

Six degrees of separation

My world on the internet (via this blog) feels at times a parallel universe from my real time world, but it seems that they do collide. i am suprised at how many people i know in one circle, in some way, form or fashion, know friends from another circle but for some reason i was completely unaware. Small world.

All you bloggers out there that i have referenced on my site, all you readers and posters out there. Houston friends and beyond. I wish we could all live in a big coldesac and have dinner on a Sunday evening sometime. That would be lovely.

For right now though, my blog will have to do.

Little Miss Sunshine

Today i went to the movies with new friend Abby (lover of Sufjian Stevens, Russian literature, and Trader Joes) and saw Little Miss Sunshine. Now, let me just add a disclaimer: Bad language is thrown about it in this movie. I don't want people to tell me i led them astray because they were offended by the movie. You've been officially warned.

If you can get over that, i think you will like it, in fact you might be like me and laugh out loud from time to time. It's like Chevy Chase's Vacation meets The Royal Tenenbaums. More than that though, some of the elements in the movie reminded of road trips in the past. Here are my top three most memorable road trips:

1. Trip with Kelli my roomate from college: Drove thru Boston, New Hampshire, Maine, Canada (New Brunswick), and Prince Edward Island. Kel's favorite part of the trip: seeing the house where they filmed Anne of Green Gables. Jen's favorite part: The old cemetaries in Boston. Least favorite part: driving in Boston, i got cussed out the whole time, despite trying to get out of there as fast as i could.

2. Trip with my father from Houston to D.C. this past May: Most memorable part: We broke down in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. My dad was so great about it from start to finish. He was so exhausted after traveling from Phoenix to come get me but didn't complain once. The trip ended with a hug from my dad and him handing over a special gift: a GINORMOUS mace canister that i can hang on my key chain. Love is driving your only daughter 1400 miles in a very sketchy car and hooking her up with a big can of mace.

3. Trip with my friend Tony and his dad to go hiking in the Sangre De Cristo Mountains in Colorado. On that trip I learned why he loves the musical Jesus Christ Superstar, and William Blake, among other things. We had set up camp in Mt. Blanco, and i remember getting out of my tent at about 2 am in the 20 degree weather and gazing up at the sky that was absolutely luminous with stars. Favorite part of the trip: taking naps in my tent and listening to the river below us....

Matt and Christy Rasch and the young'ins

Tuesday night I drove to Baltimore, because some friends, Matt and Christy were in town to visit parents. They now have three...count'em three ankle biters, one of whom was born just a few months ago. The oldest, Eliza is about four, Sophie is almost two and Josiah, the baby is three months.




Is it not surreal to see your friends' children strongly resemble their parents??? Eliza is her father. I'm not kidding. She is strong, incredibly honest and bold, and really funny. We were eating dinner and Christy complimented me on my hair. "Nuh uh!!" Eliza proclaimed, "i don't like it!."



Sophie reminds me a great deal of Christy. She is charming in a quiet way, and is her own person. She is a cuddler too which i like alot. We watched blues clues together and i got a few seconds of video. All i wanted the kid to say was hi, but you know that was not going to happen.

Sophie Take One

Sophie Take Two



Matt and Christy are now missionaries in Budapest, Hungary. They been an encouragement to me over the years. Matt and I were talking about how we both have changed alot since knowing each other in Houston. How am i different? Holy Cow, let me just count the ways. All that to say people like Matt and Christy were part of the catalyst in my life for those changes, and I'm real glad I know them.

The "S" Word: Do we just live with it, or is it a good place to live???

The man looked down at me from where I was sitting at the lunch table, or rather he was carefully studying my left ring finger which indeed, has no ring on it. He suggested a huge church in Virginia, where there were a lot of singles. “Uh huh.” I replied. This man just came into our office and descended upon me and my chicken salad and started giving me advice in an indirect way about finding a husband.

Oh and this is not the first time in the last few months a conversation like this has occurred.

I was on the phone at work with a man who does ministry all over the world, and I wanted to partner with him on a project we are working on in North Africa. In our conversation there was mention of travels to North Africa in September. “Are you single??????” he asked, almost in a gasp. “In fact, I am,” I replied. He then asks me how old I am and in his most loving fatherly way mentioned that he will be praying for me.

For goodness gracious sakes.

Well, that’s a good thing, because I am sure that God is totally unaware of this fact and He is now scrambling around heaven trying desperately to figure how to “fix me”. We can all relax, because God has officially now been notified.

I have never written about this subject before on my blog, and don’t get used to it, because I probably will not again. I don’t think I have even written about it privately in great abundance. But it seems to be a hot topic lately, especially when people are talking to me.

So here goes. Singleness: Do we just live with it, or is it a good place to live?

I believe that God knows what He is doing. More than that, I believe He is confident that He is doing a bang up job with things, including how my life is turning out. So, I’m doing my best in not always questioning Him on why He has chosen a different path for me, when the majority of my friends are married and are on their second or dare I say it third kid.

Our nature wants to compare, and I see my friends and I wonder if and when I will get to that stage in life. Maybe never. There is a part of me that considers the idea of never having a family. Yeah, my heart hurts a bit at the thought of not having children, but then I also see all the incredible opportunities I have experienced that would not have happened if I was having to think of someone else.

I spent the first year of this century in Southern China. I have had some of the greatest people around as roommates, and have learned amazing things from each one of them. I have taken more walks with God down Wilton street in Houston than anyone should ever have the privilege of experiencing. When I lived by myself in a small, yellow garage apartment near Rice U, my time with the Lord was so rich, that I couldn’t wait to get off work so I could go home and just hang out. I would never trade those years. Not for all the tea in China or a guy that closely resembles Joaquin Phoenix. Nope, sorry not even for Joaquin Phoenix.

To live is Christ is it not? My life is not my own. My desire is to live in my own skin, in whatever circumstance He sends my way and embody the fullest joy possible. I am definitely not saying I am always successful. I am also not saying that I do not desire marriage, because I certainly do. But I love my life right now, and I do not want to have the perspective of "surviving" the seasons of singleness like it was a disease that someday if I’m real good I will be cured…

Today this is what He has for me, and today it is a good place to live.

The joy of discovering my neglect

Tonight, my roomate had about 15 of her old college friends come over (in light of a wedding in town) to hang out. We were watching a DVD of some worship that she had from her old church in Cape Town, South Africa where she taught for a year. We watched it and started to sing along. Just watching the crowd, made me cry, just seeing the thousands with their hands out, head to the sky, and tears pouring down. Each soul in a different part of the journey, but with one great thing in common: they longed to be in His presence, above all things, to love Him and be loved by Him.

Later on, I closed my door and listened to my own worship, a woman by the name of Rita Springer, who actually used to lead worship in Houston. She grew up homeless, her parents staying in parks and such.... They recognized her talent though, and somehow nurtured it. Rita is so good because she sings alot about broken people that need God. The rich. The poor. The one that seems to be straight as an arrow, and the wondering son. Whether or not we recognize it, our hearts long for God.

My soul has been so weary lately. i couldn't quite place my finger on it this week, but i understand now.

Why do I neglect my first love, when He is so ready to give all of Himself?? I want to be like David that meditated on Him in the first hours of morning and in the twilight hours before i close my eyes to dream.

Let it be Your face Lord, that I seek.

Today there will be thanksgiving for.....

1. How cool it was here this morning.

2. I have a roof over my head and food to eat every day.

3. Health Insurance!!!!!!

4. My elderly, lonley Greek neighbor Anthony who leaves me apples on my front porch and helped me weed my garden last Saturday.

4. Roomates that are not crazy.

5. Friends in Texas that are oh so faithful.

6. My kitchen table. It's such a good place to write, and drink coffee, and be.

7. A dad that calls up pretty frequently to see how "the car is running".

8. The World Wide Web. i do not remember what life was like before it

9. The beautiful park down the street from my house.

10. My work involves issues I am passionate about, and I get to write about them.

And God. He doesn't get a number because He's the Alpha AND the Omega. He is good to me.

Screen on the Green and Rocky

Last night I went to the Screen on the Green with Steve (Mac enthusiast, NCC member, YWAMer) and his friend Joe, Christina, and others. We kicked the soccer ball around untill it got dark and it was time to watch the classic Rocky. The first Rocky is definitely the best of the cannon. It was fun to watch with a thousand other people at the Mall. We all cheered when Rocky gets the girl, when he makes it to the top of those flight of stairs in Philly, and when he knocks out Apollo Creed. Indoor theatres are way overrated.

Some of my favorite Rocky quotes:

1. Rocky: Adrienne!!!!!!!!

2. Rocky: "You've got gaps, I've got gaps, together we fill in the gaps..."

3. Rocky: Yo.

4. Apollo Creed: Stay in school and use your brain. Be a doctor, be a lawyer, carry a leather briefcase. Forget about sports as a profession. Sports make ya grunt and smell. See, be a thinker, not a stinker.

Hoping in the next generation

This week at work I have been in the midst of taking steps towards taking over our project in Southern Sudan, which is for right now building schools in a neighborhood in Juba. It will ultimately house 600-700 primary age children, ages 5 to 14 years. The school will also provide education for adults as well. Part of learning about the inner workings of the project is understanding the population we are helping. Many of the children we are helping live with the reality of no parents to give them a home, so they turn to the life on the streets of a desolate land. A land where there are no fathers.

Fast forward to this evening when for the first time I watched the movie Black Hawk Down. This film profoundly affected me. There is a scene where one of the Rangers, played by Josh Harnett, is called an idealist by his peers because frankly, he is an idealist, and asks why he doesn't just see his job as a mission and actually see a measure of hope in the situation. He tells them that there is a choice to be made: that we could either go in and help the people or watch a nation destroy themselves on CNN. It is a choice. Albeit a risk.

This week I was overwhelmed, not with my responsiblity but the weight of need in the region I am focused on. There is such great need in Southern Sudan, a place that is literally at ground zero in every respect. So I go back to what the Word says. That we know a God "who gives life to the dead, and calls things that are not, as though they were." The Christian Church is hanging on. One of our pastors visited D.C. just before I came on board and spoke to reps at the State Department and then rounded churches in the area. So many of the pastors have been killed in Civil War. His congregations composed mostly of widows. But still his words resound in my mind and heart, "that he asks God to change Sudan in his generation."

So for these children I pray. That we would know the love of the Father, so that we might love a fatherless generation.

Happy 32nd

In 1973, a pilot in training named Peter DiMaggio met a young high school teacher named Sandra Shutkesting in Enid, Oklahoma. They decided to hang out one day. And on August 12, 1974, they decided to hang out every day, for as long as they both shall live...

Happy Anniversary. Love, Jen

Two Eight Year Olds = 2700 Pennies and lots of heart

In our pile of donor letters we got this one today. This letter is one of the best things that's happened to me all week:

August 7th 2006

We asked our friends to go on a big penny hunt so that we could raise money for the suffering wives/children fund. In four weeks we found $27.00. It is from us (Ben and Jacob) and Joey, Sophie, Benny, Garrison, Willie and our moms friend Mrs. Gastin.

In Jesus Name,

Signed Ben and Jacob Almudevar, Age 8 (We're twins)

That's 2700 pennies found under couches, chairs, dad's pockets, and wherever else we found them when we were eight.

Miscellaneous

a friend sent me this email in regards to my blog last night, which made me laugh out loud in the middle of Panera:

...And why did you let those MAC people get their hands on you? soon you will be given a new spiritual/cult name...in other words, when can I come to your meetings.

no worries i will always go by Jen, even if i do convert...

this week has been a grey week, combined with all the uplifting world news, i need my friend joe or lisa (they are both hysterical) here so i can just laugh.


i will be going to africa soon: sept 12-22. i am real excited about being on the ground but not excited about how we get there. i hate flying. which is unfortunate considering the line of work i have chosen for myself. today i was watching the news and they were reporting that terrorists were planning to carry out another major attack on flights going towards the United States. "That's lovely", i thought to myself. If i go see a movie this weekend, it's definitely not going to be that new flick about 9/11: "World Trade Center".

British Virgin Islands

My brother Matt is a lucky guy and spent all last week here.








When we discussed the trip, the one thing that stands out in his mind is not the beauty of the island, not how amazing it was to bike and kayak and be one with nature...No, no, no..."It was the roosters Jen." There were roosters EVERYWHERE. He opened up his hotel door, and a rooster was sitting there waiting on the porch. They were coming out of the ocean he says... likely story.

Everyone needs an editor

In life... and in writing. Including me.

Promises not kept

Khartoum is cashing in on the oil boom, which is bringing revenue and infrastructure into the capital. Meanwhile the South faces incredible poverty and the demands of rebuilding a nation that is completely devastated from over twenty years of bombing and attacks. It is barely benefiting at all from these monies. One of the stipulations of the CPA was wealth sharing in regards to oil revenue.

An island unto itself
Aug 3rd 2006 KHARTOUM
The Economist

The capital benefits most from an economic boom


The conversations tend to be very different, but very predictable, when Khartoum's bourgeoisie gathers for espressos and croissants at the trendy new Ozone café. Americans and Europeans, mostly aid-workers, swap horror stories about the latest depredations in Darfur, Sudan's war-ravaged western region, or bemoan southern Sudan's “lack of capacity”. At the Sudanese tables, however, Arab men, and often women, josh about their city's brand-new traffic lights, which most still ignore, share information about new government privatisations and greet old friends who have returned to live in the Sudanese capital after years abroad.


Khartoum moves up in the world
Both views of Sudan, Africa's largest country, are valid. It is just that the Western focus on Darfur, where about 2m people are living in refugee camps as the result of a still unresolved war in the region, has obscured another fact about Sudan: the country is booming. With low inflation, GDP growth of 8% in 2005 and 13% projected by the IMF this year, Sudan is one of the fastest-growing economies in Africa. Furthermore, this success has been achieved despite the fact that the country has been subject to American sanctions since 1986, the year that the IMF ended financial assistance to the country.

Oil undoubtedly plays a big part in this boom, accounting for about 80% of the country's exports, but it does not explain all the gains. Indeed, the IMF has given guarded praise to the policies initiated by Sudan's government to liberalise the economy. It is not the kind of attention that the Islamist regime in Khartoum, accused of genocide by America for its actions in Darfur, is accustomed to.


Oil, structural adjustments that began in 1998 and the relative political stability that followed the signing of a peace deal with rebels in the south last year are encouraging foreign investment, particularly from China and the Gulf states. More needs to be done to tackle corruption and eliminate stifling regulations, yet new economic opportunities are enticing thousands of the country's rich and educated diaspora to return. More and more, Sudan's ruling National Congress Party is toning down its hitherto robust Islamist language; the new emphasis is on economic development.

However, it is almost exclusively the Arab heart of the country that is benefiting from the boom. Nearly $3 billion of foreign direct investment has come to Sudan, but well over half of it has gone to the capital and its hinterland. In the past year hotels, telecoms companies, light industries and even a Thai massage parlour have opened in a city that is still nominally ruled by sharia law.

The development that most epitomises Khartoum's new dynamism is Alsunut. Meaning “point of meeting” in Arabic, this behemoth of a residential and office project is now under construction on 65 hectares (160 acres) of land where the Blue and White Niles converge. The $4 billion project, the result of a public-private partnership between the government and DAL Group, Sudan's leading company, will transform the city by adding 63 towers varying between 15 and 35 floors in height. Over half the office space has already been sold to local and foreign companies.

However, for all the new prosperity in Khartoum, evidence of the boom outside the capital is hard to find. Progress towards improving the lot of the majority of poor Sudanese is plodding. For most people, electricity is still rare and most schools still hold classes under trees.

And, crucially, Sudan's improved economic outlook has not had any discernible impact on the mainly Christian and animist south. Hundreds of thousands of displaced southern Sudanese are leaving their refugee camps in the north and returning to what remains one of the poorest areas in Africa. Indeed, the pace of recovery in the south is so slow that some aid agencies report that villagers have started throwing sticks and stones at their passing convoys as a form of protest.

The inequitable distribution of the country's wealth has always been a large factor in stoking rebellions in the south, in Darfur and in the east against the central government in Khartoum. If that remains true of this current boom—which may last only as long as the high price of oil—it will be a huge missed opportunity to reduce some of the inequalities that still threaten to pull the country apart, with disastrous consequences for all Sudanese.

Shenandoah National Park

This was the most jam packed weekend since my car pulled into D.C. this past May. Sat. morning I went to BOWIE, Maryland to have breakfast with a girl i met at Cedar Ridge. Then back onto the orange line to hang out with some very fun Mac enthusiasts who i think have managed to pull me out of the shameful pit of PCs. The first thing to do is repent and head to an Apple Store.
On to Dulles to pickup Liz who was speaking at a church in middle of nowhere Virginia about her summer in Guatemala where she worked with gangs (Liz is another H town friend, God love em for coming up here). Acutally, it wasn't middle of nowhere, VA - in reality it was four miles from Shenandoah National Park. So a detour was in order. I walked along the Appalachian trial, took pictures of butterflies, and sat on a big fat rock overlooking the view and read some of the Word, which I had been neglecting, or at least my soul had been feeling the neglect...










Illuminated on the page were these words: "My heart is not proud, O Lord my eyes are not haughty; I do not consider myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me..."


It was good to be in a beautiful national park with just God, the gnats, and my thoughts. My soul was quiet, all attentions and affections undivided. Not worrying about mondays list of chores, or things in my life that I cannot control in the first place. Not worrying about tomorrow because tomorrow can take care of itself.

State within a state

The world news is sobering these days.

I've been wondering if Israel is suprised at the strength of Hezbollah, and if they really destroy the stronghold in Lebanon, it they will then go into Iran. I read something interesting about Hezbollah today on the BBC, how they maintain loyalty among the Shia community, that is: feed them, clothe them, take of them, ect... Keeping the government and the people in submission.

Hezbollah is not only a military group, and not only a political party; it also has social services that it provides for its supporters, Lebanon's Shia Muslims. Hezbollah has a full infrastructure that gives these people every possible means to keep standing Hussein, member of HezbollahAt one Beirut school, 1,500 people are living in a refugee centre run by Hezbollah. "The group has engineers, it has workers," says Hussein, one of the Hezbollah members running the centre. "Hezbollah has a full infrastructure that gives these people every possible means to keep standing." Another woman told me that even though they were refugees, Hezbollah was giving them everything they needed. The government had limited means, so Hezbollah was helping them, she said. This is how Hezbollah guarantees unwavering loyalty and popular support - by providing for the Shia community. The central government has been weak here for decades so it is easy for Hezbollah to step in. But there is also a sense that Hezbollah monopolises the Shia and keeps the government at bay with its schools, hospitals and women's associations. And with its substantial arsenal of weapons, many Lebanese see the group as a state within a state.

Concert at the Wolf Trap

Yesterday evening Jadine and I went to see our Katie interpret at the Guster/Ray LaMontagne concert at the Wolf Trap National Park for Performing Arts. I was excited to see Katie in all her glory, but even before i knew she was interpreting, I had been wanting to see Ray in concert.

Ray quite frankly, is amazing. Ray's influences are greats like Otis Redding, Ray Charles, Bob Dylan, Stills and Nash... When I heard him sing, it was one of the most sincere performances i have ever witnessed, it's like every fiber of his being is immersed in that moment and that song. Take the time to read about his life below because you just don't hear very many stories like his.

Okay so we weren't allowed to record but..... i did anyway. i couldn't help myself, i wanted to record ray. you won't see much because i was far away and you can hear me no, not singing, but shouting the lyrics. AHHHHH!! RAY!!! SO GOOD!! Here ya go: Ray at the Wolf Trap

I liked Guster too, and better yet, they gave Katie a shout out. Every time they were done with a song, she signed that everyone was clapping by waving her hands over her head. Throughout the concert, the guys in the band started doing it too, and by the end of the night, the audience joined in, with an occasional: "Catie!!!!!" My roomie sort of emerged with a fan club all her own.

So here is Ray's story:

Ray LaMontagne is a living example of the tranformative power fo music. AFter years of working at a shoe factory, LaMontagne had a revelation that completely shifted the course of his life.

One serendipitous morning, he woke up at 4 am to his alarm playing a song that woudl change his life: Stephen Still's "Treetop Flyer". LaMontange was deeply moved by the soulful lyrics and country-blues sound, since he hardly listened to music before, aside from the occasional radio hit. He skipped work that day and bought the Stills Alone album. He then quit his job, taking the bold first step in changing the direction of his life. He bought the well-worn records of music pioneers like Crosby, Stills and Nash, Bob Dylan, and Otis Redding and listened for hours, immersing himself in their seasoned voices and lyrics. LaMontange discovered that music was a form of emotional expression that had immense healing power. He knew he wanted to be a musician, so he taught himself to sing.

By 1999, he created a demo of 10 songs and was booked as the opening act for several fold performers. It wasn't long before he was noticed, and soon he was signed to a publishing deal with Chrysalis, where producer and player Ethan Johans helped create his debut album, Trouble.

With a voice comparable to Van Morrison and Otis Redding, LaMontagne sings with sincerity and soul.